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Chapter 5
For the next two
weeks, the Yggdrasil served
as a secure and comforting home base for
my still tentative explorations of Edoku; here
I had shelter and toilet facilities at hand,
and cuisine could be ordered up in the hotel refectory or even for delivery to my
room without requiring knowledge of the locations or menus
of the city's numerous but outre and more often than not
well-camouflaged restaurants.
I say the city's restaurants rather than the planet's, for after
only a few days' sojourn, even a jejune auslander such as I
began to adopt the perceptual mode of the Edojin and regard
Edoku as an enormous city rather than a small planet.
For the fact was that Edoku had few of the attributes of a
planet. There were no continents, no seas, no characteristic
gravity gradient, no coherent weather systems, no regular
procession of night and day, and no real sense of geographical
distance. Within a day or two, I began to realize that the
horizon was always much closer at hand than it seemed, for
the ersatz geographical features, while betraying no overall relationship
of scale taken one to another, were as a generality crafted as miniatures so as to create the illusion of a far
larger planetary surface. The totally arbitrary crazy quilt of
gravity gradients was also a necessary part of this legerdemain
of perspective, for in point of astronomical fact, Edoku was a
modest-sized moon whose natural gravity would have been
only about .2 standard g, a kinesthetic clue which would have
immediately destroyed the visual illusion of a far distant
horizon on a much larger world.
Somehow, my penetration of this trick of scale made Edoku
slightly less daunting -- at least in terms of locomotion if not
location -- and once I began to learn something of the arcana
of the public transportation system, the perceptual transformation was complete.
On a planet where gravity varied abruptly and dramatically
every kilometer or so, low-level aerial transport was far too
risky to life and limb for even the Edojin to contemplate, and
so this mode was confined to suborbital ballistic shuttles, and
these horrendous craft, perversely propelled as they were by
primeval rockets belching flame, smoke, and earsplitting thunder, seemed to exist more for thespic effect than any semblance of practicality .So too the boats, punts, barques, canoes,
und so weiter, available for hire on every body of even
marginally navigable water.
The occasional small vehicles-wheeled, legged, or gravity
floated-which were to be seen in arrondissements where a
system of streets was in evidence might be practical for
locomotion within their precincts, but were useless for travel
of any real distance. As for those Edojin who rode about on a
bewildering assortment of steeds, no two of which seemed to
betray a genetic commonality, these folk, as far as I was
concerned, were prime candidates for a mental retreat.
Indeed, for the first few days my modest wanderings were
constrained, first by the distance I could cover afoot, and
second by the necessity of keeping the hotel Yggdrasil either
constantly within my visual sphere or, at most, no further
from my sight than a short trail of memorizable landmarks
away.
Only when I screwed up my courage and inquired of the
domo of the hotel as to how an auslander entirely unfamiliar
with the city might explore beyond walking distance from the
hotel without becoming hopelessly lost, was I somewhat patronizingly informed of the existence of the Rapide.
Unbeknowst to me, there was a network of tunnels under
the entire surface of Edoku, with stations in almost every
building of significance as well as cunningly concealed in a
plethora of geographic features, though for esthetic reasons,
these were unmarked and had to be either memorized or
inquired after locally.
Once access to the Rapide was achieved, however, the
system was such that it could be utilized with relative ease
even by a naif such as myself. In each Rapide station was a
goodly supply of Bubbles. These were simple seats mounted\
on floaters and enclosed in the same sort of voidbubble field,
used for inspecting the exteriors of Void Ships. Each Bubble
was equipped with a chip slot and a display screen.
There were two modes of command. If the cognomen of a
specific destination was spoken, the Rapide would forthwith
deduct the proper debit from your chip and convey you
thither. If one requested a class of destination such as "ho-
tels," "restaurants," "mountains," "palaces of pleasure," und
so weiter, a complete alphabetized list of same would scroll
across the display screen until a choice was announced.
Distance was not a relevant parameter, for the tunnels of
the Rapide were maintained in hard vacuum within an inertial nullifier field, permitting enormous accelerations without
discomfort, and so once the destination was announced, you
were whisked down the mercifully featureless tunnel at tremendous if entirely imperceptible velocity; via the Rapide,
no point on Edoku was more than twenty minutes from any
other.
Thus, once I became conversant with the Rapide, Edoku
became, in practical effect as well as psychic perspective, an
endless and randomly accessible succession of possible venues discontinuously distributed by name or category and
bearing no geographical or temporal relationship one to the
other. The restaurant in which I chose to dine might be a few
minutes' walk from the mountain on which I took a postprandial stroll or it might be halfway around the planet. More-
over, no matter where I chanced to find myself when fatigue
set in, I had only to insert my chip, speak its name, and be
safely returned to the hotel Yggdrasil in a matter of minutes.
While the Rapide gave me random access on a hit or miss
basis, and while it reduced the Edoku of my perception from a chaotic
planetary vastness to an infinite succession of wonders and bizarrities, each in effect a close neighbor of every
other, it can hardly be said that such a mode of transport
served to enhance my sense of psychic orientation.
Au contraire, while I was now at liberty to wander Edoku
entire, my perception of its realities was now, if anything,
more fragmented, and so too, therefore, the consciousness
informed by same, which went through the rounds of the
arbitrary hours and days not merely disconnected from any
sequence of time save that of hunger, fatigue, and sleep, but
disconnected as well from any topographical map of the
territory .
Moreover, my selections of restaurants, palaces of pleasure, entertainments, scenic vistas, and the like, were determined entirely by arbitrary choices from the categorical lists
offered up by the data bank of the Rapide, and these listings,
or so it seemed, were compiled with no little arbitrary caprice themselves.
Vraiment, I could rest assured that any establishment filed
under "restaurants" would supply me with nourishment, but
the cuisinary style and venue of same might be anything and
everything.
I was delighted at a banquet in the Ran mode consumed
on a barge floating down a river in a twilit canyon, bemused
to find myself supping entirely on pastries circulating on
platters affixed to the heads of birdlike creatures high in a
treetop, appalled to be offered a breakfast consisting entirely
of tidbits of raw meats and fishes in the midst of an extravagant tantric performance, disgusted to find myself in a firelit
cave where the diners, required to doff their clothing for the
occasion, were constrained to rip small roasted animals and
fowl apart with their fingers, entirely outraged by the establishment in which the cuisine consisted of bizarre living gene-
crafted birds and beasts which burbled and chittered as they
were consumed, and nauseated by the pungent and acrid
savors of abstract cubes of many colors served up in an
emporium constructed entirely of gleaming white tile.
Similarly, a random selection of "palaces of pleasure" might
present me with emporiums offering more or less quotidian
assortments of sexual scenarios, if often conducted in venues
of bizarre decor .
But as often as not, I would find myself presented with a
selection of gross and mindless creatures whose phallic, oral,
digital, and tentacular endowments and sexual tropisms had
been gene-crafted for the performance of tantric figures that
would have astounded even my mother. And while I essayed
a few of these grotesque figures with creatures who were all
lingam or indeed were equipped with multiple phalluses of superhuman
puissance, and while I had certainly never considered myself an arch reactionary in matters of sexual esthetics, I nevertheless found these experiences universally appalling
in a psychic sense even while enjoying, if that is the word, a
multiplicity of orgasms.
"Theaters" and "holocines" could be relied upon to offer up
more or less what the categories implied throughout the
worlds of men, namely live performances of dramas on the
one hand and hologramic renderings of same on the other,
but on Edoku, "entertainments" covered a broad spectrum of
the sublime, bizarre, boring, incomprehensible, and vile indeed! Even now, my memories remain a kaleidoscopic blur of
images, sounds, odors, experiences, and feelings whose fragmentation owes far more to the nature of the realities themselves than to the intoxicants I consumed to enhance, or in
some cases mitigate, my perception thereof.
There were soaring dances in zero-gravity in which the
groundlings of the audience were invited to join clumsily
with the performers, and slow-motion dances performed by
mixed troupes of humans and gene-crafted saurian behemoths under crushing gravity in a setting which simulated
the imagined surface of some gas giant planet.
There were displays of hopefully ersatz tortures and executions performed in grim stone dungeons and public squares,
and a plethora of mock battles between human warriors of
various historical periods and creatures gene-crafted to simulate nonhuman sapients of fanciful imagining as well as monsters out of literature and myth.
In a vast amphitheater under pale moonlight several hours'
worth of assorted colorful and earsplitting explosions were set
off for the delectation of the audience. Another "symphony"
consisted entirely of fugal sequences of odors-sublime, outre,
and disgusting -- experienced in perfect, soundless, weight-
less blackness.
And of course more quotidian music of every conceivable
style, mode, and period, intermixed and interwoven with
much of the foregoing, but also performed in solemn isolation
on mountaintops, amidst desert dunes, on floating barges,
even in simulacra of ancient Terrestrial concert halls, where
the audience was outfitted with stiff and uncomfortable vestments of white and black and constrained to endure a stifling
humidity .
If I give the impression that I passed these first two weeks
on Edoku as little more in a psychic sense than a wide-eyed
indiscriminate viewpoint, soaking up and recording sensory
images with no more self-awareness or analytical attempt at
integrating same into the timestream of my spirit than a word
crystal mindlessly storing everything spoken into the scriber ,
vraiment the state of my consciousness was, if anything, even
more trancelike than that might imply.
Strange to say, or may hap not so strange at all, I made no
friends, or indeed acquaintances, during this period, for I had
no psychic energy left over for even quotidian human interaction, let alone attempts to touch the spirits of the arcane and
enigmatic Edojin. Not with every waking moment, every
quantum of my attention, given over to coping with the
overloading of all my senses and perceptions by a veritable
torrent of fragmented, novel, and entirely disorienting
experiences.
Which is not to say that this totally experiential state of
consciousness was unpleasant, even during those moments
when the surreal landscape through which it wandered appeared disorienting, distasteful, or even daunting. Au contraire,
to the spirit of that young child of Nouvelle Orlean who had
spent the last two years in the pursuit of precisely the ecstatic
state of consciousness induced by satoric moments of the
transcendently novel, this state of perpetual and all-but-permanent intimacy with wonder was the blissful perfection
of all that I in my wildest imaginings had hoped the vie of a
Child of Fortune would be.
It is therefore, upon reflection, not so surprising, ne, that
my mind had no place for thoughts of exploring means of
securing ongoing wherewithal, nor that a young girl in such a
state of ecstatic intoxication with wonder itself, and a girl,
moreover, who had never had to pay much attention to value
given for value received in the bargain, was hardly in a frame
of mind to give much thought to the price of wine in Xanadu.
***
Out of this trance I was at last inevitably awoken by a rude
karmic satori.
One day upon awakening and completing my toilette, I
paused by the counter in the lobby of the Yggdrasil as had
become routine to have the next day's rent debited from my
chip, As always, the domo of the hotel inserted it into his
credit slot.
But now a garish sound issued forth, something like a loud
mechanical buzz, and something like a lip-vibrating brak of chastisement.
I leaped backward at this boorish and insulting noise, but
the domo, far from being startled by this event,' assumed an
air of prim and knowing disapproval, directed not at his
obviously malfunctioning equipment but at my own person.
"Quelle chose?" I demanded.
"Quelle chose? Voila, meine kleine urchin, your credit
balance the mathematical perfection of absolute zero has now
achieved."
"Impossible!" I cried. "My father assured me that chip was
good for two months' living expenses on a planet of mean
galactic cost of living!"
"Indeed?" said the domo, presenting me with a printed
readout of all my debits, a scroll of daunting length, "And you
imagine Edoku a planet dedicated to providing bargains ist?
May hap largesse chez papa did not calculate ninety-seven
trips via Rapide, four dozen meals of the hautest cuisine, not
please to mention this truly impressive plethora of palaces of
pleasure, theatrical performances, holocines, concerts, and
assorted spectacles and entertainments? Moreover, the
Yggdrasil be not some rude country inn on a frontier planet.
You may verify the figures by your own calculation, naturell
ment, though this might consume several hours ..."
I ran a quick scan of the horrendous and lengthy document, This was more than enough to fill me with a dreadful
dismay, a certain sense of outrage and no little chagrin at my
own profligacy, as well as to convince me that verifying the
mathematics of several hundred deductions would avail me
nothing, It was all there, and no doubt I had taken all these
Rapide trips, eaten all these meals, attended all these entertainments, und so weiter. The galling truth was that I had
never inquired as to the cost of any of these items at the
time, and as I now retrospectively learned just how extravagantly expensive everything on Edoku truly was, I had no
doubt that I had managed to squander two months' worth of
ordinary living expenses in two short weeks.
"But ... but what am I to do now?" I stammered.
"Vacate forthwith," I was told.
"A hopper now fetches your
baggage."
"But ... but I'm entirely without funds! Where will I
sleep? Row will I eat?"
"By your wits, ne, assuming you possess them. Any venue
of commerce will credit your chip in return for ruegelt."
"Ruegelt?"
"Ruegelt," the domo affirmed, displaying for my enlightenment three small discs of silvery metal. "Each 'coin,' so-called, represents a unit of credit. "
"But how do I secure this ruegelt?"
The domo shrugged. "Usual means," he said.
"The usual means?"
"Hai," he said more crossly.
"Gainful employment, mendicancy, or theft. I am aware of no others."
As I stood there shaking in a state of absolute despair and
terror, a hopper arrived and presented me with my pack.
Such was my state of chagrin and helplessness that I imagined that this little
creature too was regarding me with contemptuous amusement.
Desperately, and without regard for the folly of the at-
tempt, I presented my other chip to the domo. "I can pay
with this, " I told him.
"So?" he inserted the chip into his slot, perused the read-out, and returned it to me with a moue of contempt. "Valid
only for passage to Glade for one Moussa Shasta Leonardo.
Sans value on the surface of any planet." His expression
softened somewhat. "Naturellement, you can use it now to
return home forthwith without having to brave the vie of the
indigent Child of Fortune, ne ..." he suggested.
At this, my spirit was sufficiently roused from the timidity
induced by its state of helpless despair to vow "Never!"
"Never?"
"Well at least not without trying ..." I said in a much
tinier voice.
"Well spoken, child," the domo replied. "Bonne chance,
buena suerte, vaya con gluck, und so weiter. But now you
must leave the premises tout suite."
And so I was constrained to shoulder my pack and slink out
of the lobby of the Yggdrasil, through the porchways where
guests more fortunate than I were taking their ease, and
across the rainbow bridge which led, as it were, from the
safety and security of lost Eden into the harsh and unknown
world of trial and toil, and while there were no angels with
flaming swords to bar my return, I knew that from here on in
it would be a road of my own making that I must travel.
Chapter 6
I know not how long I wandered in a state
of numb dread and formless sullen anger,
nor even whether I traversed any great distance from the Yggdrasil or staggered in
rough circles, for this was Edoku, where
the hour of the day in any given locus gave
no clue to time's passage, and the random landscape gave no
clue as to vector. Moreover, if Edoku had daunted my spirit
entirely before I had found the Yggdrasil, and had seemed
impossible to encompass in any coherent fashion before I had
discovered the Rapide, now I was reduced to an even more
discombobulated state than that of the naif who had first set
foot on the planet, for I was cursed with the knowledge of
what I had lost, and while the little girl I had been might rail
against the outrageous prices which had been her downfall,
the nascent Child of Fortune could not entirely escape the
perception that she really had no one to blame for this
disaster but herself.
Vraiment, what a catastrophe it was! Immediately upon
being expelled from the Yggdrasil, the fact that I no longer
had funds to secure food and shelter, horrendous though it
was to a girl who had never been forced to miss a meal in her
life, had seemed to be the full extent of the dilemma. But
when I reflexively started for the nearest familiar Rapide
station and then suddenly realized that I had no funds even
for transport, I began to perceive that the vie of a total
pauper in a venue such as Edoku was likely to present
difficulties beyond even starvation and exposure.
For one thing, my sphere of operations was now limited to
the range of my feet, and what was worse, I had no idea of
how to reach any familiar locus by the tedious process of
laying one down after the other, for all my explorations of the
city had been conducted via Rapide, and I had therefore
learned exactly nothing of the quotidian topology.
My only consolation from this perception was that a mental
map of the territory would in any case have been useless
knowledge, for I had no means of securing food from any of
the emporiums I had previously patronized even if I could
find them.
Nor would even the magical power to transport myself to
anywhere I wished by act of will have enabled me to even
begin to seek remunerative employment. For when it came
to the ebb and flow of credit, I had been entirely occupied
with exploring the manifold possibilities of expenditure, and
had not given so much as a passing thought to the process of
accumulation.
Indeed, as I wandered aimlessly through the streets and
parklands, the public squares and arrondissements of what
seemed like commercial activity in a slowly escalating state of
agitated depression sharpened by the apprehension of the
empty space in my stomach where breakfast should have
been, as I regarded the extravagantly dressed Edojjn sipping
wine, inhaling intoxicants, and languidly picking at haute
cuisine, I realized that while everyone in the city seemed
lavishly wealthy, I had never given the slightest thought as to
how all these riches were acquired.
Or rather how I might insinuate myself into the economic
bourse. I knew that Edoku was a center of the arts and
sciences and commerce, and that this, no doubt, was the
foundation of the general wealth of the populace, but in these
areas of endeavor my only skill, at best, was that of the
appreciative connoisseur. Vraiment, I could perceive within
my own repertoire not even some skill that might earn me
credits in some humbler occupation; I could not prepare even
rude cuisine, I knew nothing of the art of waiting on table,
and my lack of knowledge of the rudiments of commerce had
been more than amply demonstrated. Rumbling myself to
the point of begging for alms I might eventually consider if
only I had some notion of the graces and techniques of the
mendicant's trade, and theft, if not precluded by moral nice-
ties, seemed entirely beyond my powers, for I could hardly
imagine myself overpowering a victim and absconding with
what ruegelt his purse might contain.
Naturellement, I was still in possession of the ring of Touch
which my father had given me, and in some venue far less
sophisticated than Edoku, its amplification of my tantric puissance combined with what I had once regarded as my considerable amatory skills might very well have allowed me to
secure funds as a tantric performer according to parental
plan. But here, where creatures were gene-crafted for performances in palaces of pleasure and the sensual arts were
refined to levels beyond my comprehension for the delectation of the most jaded connoisseurs of same, even augmented
by my father's art, it seemed to me that I had about as much
chance of succeeding as a tantric performer as a tantrically
unschooled rube from a frontier world would have had in
Nouvelle Orlean.
At length, these weighty considerations of economic survival, and even the gnawing hunger in my
belly, were superseded by an even more overwhelming matter of immediate
urgency which I had thusfar not even considered but which nevertheless had
proceeded stealthily beneath my conscious attention to the point where
it now intruded into my awareness to a level of entirely alarming dominance. Which is to
say that after many hours of wandering, my bladder had
finally filled to the point of bursting, and I would now have to
rouse myself from my funk and take my first practical survival
step. I had to find a toilet at once.
Far easier said than done. Toilets, I knew, were to be
found in every hotel, restaurant, taverna, and entertainment
emporium in Edoku, and naturellement I had used them
often enough. Alas, all of these establishments required the presentation
of valid chip of credit as a bona fide in order to
even gain admittance, and it was made clear to me in terms
of considerable outrage that their sanitary facilities were not
available gratuit to other than paying customers.
By the time I had screwed up my courage for a sixth
attempt to gain access to toilet facilities after five curt and
altogether belligerent rebuffs, this time in a modest taverna
carved into a miniature desert butte, I was fairly squirming in
agony, to the point where the upholding of dignity was no
longer even a passing consideration, and I accosted the domo
of the taverna in a forthright whine.
"Please! Bitte! Por
favor! Your toilet, kudasai! I have no
funds, but I am bursting with need! I beg of you-"
"The grossity!" exclaimed this worthy, a thin green man in
a saffron robe. "Taverna desu! Public jai nai!"
"What?"
"The Public Service Station over the stream and in the
woods desu! Ici, nein! The insult!"
"What are you talking about?" I cried.
"What do I talk about? What do you talk about? Surely
even Children of Fortune comprend the difference subtle
between a taverna and a Public!"
"Kudasai, bitte, mercy upon my ignorance, good sir," I
begged. "I'm entirely new at this. I have no idea what you
mean by a Public Service Station!"
The domo's expression softened somewhat, at least to the
point of regarding me as an ignorant bumpkin in some distress rather than a deliberately insulting
churl. "Nouvelle
Child of Fortune desu, auslander, ne? Wakaru. Attends,
kind: Edoku a magnet for indigent Children of Fortune desu,
ne, therefore wir wollen nicht a great display of public munificence to render to same, ne, lest what is already a flood
become a tsunami. But Edoku a civilized planet desu, and we
cannot therefore allow even such as yourself to starve or
suffer disease, and certainly not to be forced to relieve yourself al fresco, ne. Voila, the Public Service Stations, where
you will find the necessities of survival and no more, pared to
the edge of physical discomfort, but not beyond."
Thanking him far more profusely than his modest aid justly
required, I hastened, indeed fairly ran, to the venue he had
suggested, and there in the little wood, screened from casual
sight by tall hedges, was the first truly unesthetic construct I
had seen on Edoku. Vraiment, as if in contrast to every other
building in the city, the Public Service Station--or rather
Stations, for, as I was to learn only too well, the hundreds of
them secreted all over the city were entirely identical -- seemed
designed to negate all concepts of esthetics. It was a single-story windowless cube constructed of some textureless gray
material, the perfect nullity of its design marred only by an
oblong doorless portal.
Inside, the Public was only marginally less unappetizing.
All of the interior surfaces were of the same gray substance,
entirely unadorned, and the lighting was an unwholesome
bluish-white harshness emanating from naked overhead fixtures. The central area of the single room was given over to
benches and tables seamlessly extruded from the gray material of the floor; at these sat about a dozen people more or
less the same age as myself. The far end of the room was
given over to shower stalls, for the doors supplied only a
modicum of privacy, and 1 could see the shanks of bathers
abluting themselves within. To the right as 1 entered was a
counter with a bored-looking elder functionary lounging be-
hind it, a long rack holding several dozen gray garments, a
series of water fountains, and then a long narrow table piled
with strange rubbery-looking gray blocks.
All these accoutrements I perceived, as it were, en pissant,
for the left-hand wall was given over entirely to toilet stalls,
and to the nearest unoccupied stall I scurried, with only the
briefest nod of my head to a young boy in a singularly
unappealing gray smock who had lifted his arm and pointed
his finger thereto in an entirely superfluous gesture of friendly,
if jocular direction.
***
After relieving myself of both catabolic waste products and
the chagrin of my not exactly graceful entry , I emerged from
the toilet stall to essay my debut into the society of the Public
Service Stations and apprise myself of the nature of the
facilities and services which Edoku in its magnanimity provided gratuit to indigent Children of Fortune such as myself.
Now that I had dealt with the most pressing matter, I
could more exquisitely appreciate the extent of my thirst and
hunger, and so I first repaired to one of the fountains, where
I surfeited myself on water so perfectly tepid and tasteless as
to be remarkable for the very perfection of its blandness.
Food, however, seemed nowhere in evidence, and so I
next introduced myself to a group of two young boys and a
young girl lounging at the nearest table. "Hello, I am Moussa
Shasta Leonardo. My mother, Shasta Suki Davide --"
The younger of the two boys, dressed, like the girl, in a
singularly unappealing gray smock, held up his hand to stay
the telling of my name tale. "Greener, ne?" he said. "We
don't exchange name tales, since we've just started to live the
tales of our own freenoms, right, so all we have is the
kindernoms someone else gave us, and paternoms and
maternoms mean nothing to the vrai Child of Fortune, ne.
So in the Publics, you're just Moussa, I'm just Dan, she's just
Jooni, and he's just Mart."
While this bizarre mode of introduction seemed entirely
uncivilized to me, I felt in no position to deliver a lecture on
manners; they seemed friendly enough, and, moreover, I had
more pressing needs than the desire to hear their name tales. "Bien," I said amiably, ''as you surmised, I'm entirely
innocent of the ways of the Public Service Stations. I was given to
understand that food was available gratuit, but I see no
refectory, nor even a cold buffet ..."
For reasons which I was about to learn, the three of them
seemed to regard this as high comedy, breaking into raucous
and ironic laughter. There were half a dozen gray oblong
blocks on the table before them; Dan handed me one of them
with an exaggerated courtly flourish.
"Voila, your very first fressen bar, Moussa," he said. "you
are about to enjoy a unique culinary experience."
I fingered the unappetizing-looking gray thing dubiously.
It felt like soap. I sniffed at it. It was almost odorless, save for
a subtle odor of something chemical, perhaps formaldehyde.
It seemed to me that I was being set up as the victim of some
juvenile prank ...
Seeing my reluctance, Jooni took up another fressen bar,
bit off a large chunk, and rapidly chewed it down with an
entirely neutral expression. "Mangia, Moussa," she said. «Not
only perfectly safe, but each fressen bar is perfectly com-
pounded to provide optimum nutriment for one human for
one standard day."
"But we may eat as many as we want," Mart added.
"Though we may not want as many as we eat," Dan muttered enigmatically.
Properly famished, and at least assured that I wasn't about
to poison myself, I bit off a sizable chunk of my fressen bar
and masticated it appraisingly.
It had the nontexture of a bland fromage made of cellulose
dust. It had no taste at all, or rather, perhaps, the perfectly
neutral savor of a wad of wet paper. I chewed it down swiftly
and mechanically, if only to clear my palate of this wretched
substance, while my companions, seeing my expression, burst
once more into laughter .
"It's vile!" I
cried. "It's disgusting!"
"Try again and reconsider," Mart said. "you will find it
neither vile nor disgusting, but something both easier to
consume and more boring. "
"Perhaps you have sampled the art of some great chef
maestro and marvelled at its culinary perfection?" Jooni said.
"Such art is a triumph of cuisinary esthetics, ne?"
"Well you should also appreciate the art behind the creation of the
fressen bar, " Dan said. "Somewhere on Edoku
there is a chef maestro who has achieved, through the exercise of daunting skill, total culinary antiperfection. The fressen
bar is not the result of cuisinary incompetence; au contraire,
it is a triumph, a perfectly nutritious meal perfectly shorn of
the slightest hint of cuisinary esthetics!"
"Entirely in keeping with the Edojin's general regard for
Children of Fortune," Jooni added, and then, as ravenous
hunger overcame esthetic reluctance and I glumly gobbled
down the rest of my fressen bar, the three of them delivered
up a communal lecture which admirably served to apprise me
of my current true status in Edoku's scheme of things and
induct me into the demimonde of the Public Service Stations.
Indeed the latter were the perfect practical incarnation of
the former, for the Publics were designed with demonic
perfection to supply us with precisely the absolute essentials
of animal existence and exactly nothing more. Toilets and
bathing facilities. A medical dispensary and other minimal
healing services. The strictly functional and esthetically dismal gray smocks for those of us without serviceable clothing
on our backs. Entirely tasteless distilled water. And of course
the unspeakable but perfectly nutritious fressen bars.
As for sleeping accommodations, did not Edoku abound in
every sort of public parkland to suit any conceivable taste for
temperature, climate, hour of the day, season, and even
gravity gradient?
Edoku, according to the social philosophy of the Edojin,
was morally obligated to safeguard our protoplasmic existence, but our esthetic and spiritual requirements were the
responsibility not of the body politic but of ourselves.
Moreover, we were assured at every opportunity, the people of Edoku would accuse us not of ingratitude on the basis
of wounded civic pride should any of us choose to desert their
planet for a venue of more lavish public munificence. Au
contraire, as a bona fide of their good will in this regard,
Children of Fortune leaving Edoku were gifted with a subsidized 25% discount on electrocoma passage in any and all
Void Ships departing the planet.
***
Thus did the Publics serve as the salons, restaurants, and
bazaars of the Children of Fortune of Edoku, and thus did I
become a citizen of the demimonde which existed in the
interstices of Great Edoku, if not exactly out of sight of the
educated eye, then at least discreetly tucked away in the
nooks and crannies.
When I had been a haut turista with a valid chip of credit
and quarters in the hotel Yggdrasil, I had never noticed the
small gray buildings screened by shrubbery or built in the
obscured bottoms of ravines or hidden in rarely-frequented
copses or secreted in alleyways between tall towers. Nor had
I regarded the occasional figure dressed in a gray smock as
anything but an Edojin with a peculiarly outre sense of style;
in fact, among the colorful throngs of birds of paradise, such
dull plumage faded into effective invisibility, unless, of course,
you were a bird of the same species.
Similarly, who was to notice that the parks and gardens and
woodlands served as regular dormitories for a considerable
population of indigents when these same venues were also
frequented by the Edojin themselves, who were much given
over to lounging on lawns, postprandial al fresco naps, and
amatory exercises conducted in dells and bowers?
Now, however, being barred by pecuniary circumstances
from the restaurants, hotels, and entertainment emporiums,
and being limited in the range of my wanderings to the
ground I could cover afoot, I experienced a perceptual reversal of figure and ground. The extravagant buildings of the
urban arrondissements, the pavilions and palaces of pleasure,
the hotels and entertainment emporiums, all hardly impinged
on the forefront of my conscious attention, for they had now
become facets of a society, indeed a reality, from which I was
exiled; these now assumed the perceptual role of a background blur, an extravagant kaleidoscopic ground against which
I perceived with a vividness and detail sharpened by practical
imperatives the quotidian realm of the Children of Fortune
which all along had been cunningly hidden in plain sight.
I might not know which fanciful building contained a restaurant or taverna nor the modes of cuisine and drink to be
found within as I wandered aimlessly about a relatively circumscribed territory,
but within a few days I knew the precise location of every Public therein. The entertainments to
be had for a price within this vecino might be a matter of
complete indifference, but soon enough I became a knowledgeable connoisseur of the gardens, woods, and parklands. I
knew where one might find a luxuriant lawn under warm
midnight skies with just enough gravity to keep a sleeping body from drifting, or where one might nap on a forest floor
at twilight, or bake one's bones on a noonday beach beside a
lake, or secure a bower by a cooling stream in a land where
dawn remained perpetually imminent.
In short, I was a typical Child of Fortune of Edoku: fresh
from home, out of funds, on the planet only a short time,
subsisting on fressen bars, sleeping al fresco, and frequenting
the Publics as much to pass the time as to utilize the practical
facilities.
For in truth, most of us had little to do with ourselves in
this stage of our evolution as Children of Fortune but wander
aimlessly about the landscape and public venues, sleep, engage in desultory amorous dalliance, or gather in the Public
Service Stations to exchange tales, lore, and gossip.
Most of which involved stratagems whereby we might some-
how obtain sufficient ruegelt to either regain access to the
restaurants, hotels, entertainment emporiums, and particularly to the Rapide, or to quit Edoku for a less financially
demanding planet. That, and methods whereby we might
gain entree to the elite circles of Public Service Station Society --
those wiser, older, and more experienced Children of Fortune who had neither gone home in surrender nor chosen to
work their way off the planet, but who had carved out their
niches in the social ecology of Edoku itself by organizing
themselves into small tribes for the communal purpose of
securing ruegelt from the throngs of the city.
While these lordly urchins consumed fressen bars only
when they were down on their luck, the ruegelt in their
pockets could not purchase freedom from the need to void
their bowels and bladders, and so they too were required to
pay regular visits to the Publics, though by and large they
deigned not to mingle with the likes of us.
But we saw them often enough, and for the most part they
were quite distinguishable from greeners like ourselves. For
one thing, they were never seen to take a fressen bar; even
when the necessity did arise, so it was said, they would
patiently seek out a Public that was empty for a moment and
then scoop up as many as they could carry to consume secretly in their hidden burrows. Nor was this tale difficult to
credit in light of the general hauteur with which they carried
themselves in our lowly presence. Then too they were generally older and wore either cheapjack versions of
extravagant
Edojin modes or Public smocks painted with grandiose tribal
ensigns, and carried out their necessary business among us
with a swiftness and indifference to social niceties that led us
to declare that they would have given up excretion entirely in
order to preserve their dignity in our eyes if only they could.
Among the true elite of Edoku, however, dignity was not
exactly their stock in trade. There were four tribes working
the parklands and streets of the vecino for ruegelt and it was
easy enough to observe their techniques, though any attempt
to ape them by someone not formally inducted into the guild,
we were obliquely given to understand, would result in a
sound thrashing.
The largest of these local tribes was the Sparkies, some
fifteen or twenty strong, who frequented the busy streets and
particularly the parklands, peddling tidbits of finger food.
While the Edojin could easily purchase more artful fare at
any of a hundred restaurants, the Sparkies catered to their
immediate whims on the spot, and, moreover, many of the
Edojin found it drole to grant their custom to these urchins
upon occasion. Similarly did the Tinkers depend upon the
aura of quaintness clinging to the repute of the crafts of
Children of Fortune in the eyes of the Edojin, for the quality
and design of the rude jewelry, paintings, items of personal
adornment, and assorted geegaws that they hawked was such
that they could hardly have had much trade on the basis of
intrinsic worth alone.
As for the Buccaneers, who numbered no more than a
dozen, their commerce depended upon certain peculiarities
of the ambiguous Edojin legal philosophy which even to this
day I find difficult to comprehend. While certain items of
trade -- mainly psychochemicals with unpleasant or even dangerous side effects-were legally proscribed to the extent that
no transaction involving same could be recorded on a chip,
Edoku was entirely indifferent to what changed hands outside
the electronic bourse for ruegelt.
Indeed, even the legal attitude towards the smallest of the
local tribes, the Wayfaring Strangers, who were straightforward pickpockets and pilferers, was difficult for an auslander
to fathom, Any miscreant caught in the act of a simple theft
would be deprived of everything in his possession including
the clothes on his back by an impromptu posse, but no
further sanction would be taken. On the other hand, anyone
apprehended for applying violence of any sort in the commission of a theft would be subject to a session of physiologically
benign but nevertheless temporarily agonizing torture.
While it was only
too obvious that the only feasible means
of escaping indigency was to gain entry to one of these tribes,
the truth is that I had little desire to do so, for I did not relish
the thought of spending my time cooking or peddling, I had
absolutely no skill when it came to crafting trinkets, and I had
too much pride, not to say moral scruples, to descend to
thievery.
To the endless scheming and theorizing on means and
methods of gaining entree to a tribe and critical discussions of
the comparative merits of the Tinkers, Buccaneers, Sparkies,
and Wayfaring Strangers which were current in the society of
the local Publics, I was therefore rather loftily indifferent.
Until, that is, I learned of the Gypsy Jokers.
I was lounging about the Public in the bottom of the
miniature canyon which marked the border between noonday
woods and desert night, nibbling absently on a fressen bar,
when two of these legendary creatures made their appearance.
Two boys entered the Public, and without a glance or word
to anyone, made straight for the toilets. The one wearing
yellow and green divided blouson from trousers with a strange
sash I thought must have been quite ancient, for it was so
thoroughly patched with scores, or even hundreds, of irregular scraps of wildly assorted cloths that none of the original
material was visible. The one dressed in red and blue striping
wore a beret of the same sort of patchwork.
But as soon as the toilet doors were closed behind them,
the whole place began to buzz with bemused if not astonished excitement.
"Gypsy Jokers, ne?" exclaimed Jooni, who was sitting at
table beside me but directed her remark across the table at
Rand, a boy known for his devotion to the lore of the tribes,
and in truth for a certain pedantry on the subject.
Rand nodded solemnly. "You can tell by the Cloth of Many
Colors; all the Gypsy Jokers are said to wear some item made
of it. It is said that Pater Pan wears a great cloak of it, though
some say a coat, and other versions have him dressed in a
whole suit of patchwork, the so-called Traje de Luces."
"But isn't their camp a long way from here --"
"What are the Gypsy Jokers, bitte, who is this Pater Pan,
and what is this excitement?" I demanded of Rand.
He gave me a somewhat patronizing look, but of course
was only too willing to enlighten my abysmal ignorance out of
his vast store of knowledge. "The Gypsy Jokers are a tribe,
naturellement, it is said one of the largest on Edoku, and
surely the richest, for they ply many trades, all of them with
great success. "
At this, my interest was definitely piqued. "What sorts of
trades?"
"Crafts, cuisine, all the ordinaire, but also, most lucratively, ruespieling, street theater, circus, tantric performance,
the various arts of entertainment. It is said that they have
their own village somewhere, an Edoku for Children of For
tune, as it were. Or more precisely, for those fortunates they
deign to admit to their tribe."
"Indeed?" I said with no little enthusiasm. For the first
time, I considered using my wiles to gain admission to a
tribe, for the vie of a Gypsy Joker seemed far more promising
than that of a Tinker or a Sparkie." And this Pater Pan?"
"You have not heard the tales of Pater Pan?" Rand exclaimed in what seemed like sincere astonishment. "He is
their domo, it is said. The wisest, oldest, and most outre
Child of Fortune in all Edoku, it is said, if not in the worlds
of men. A mage of all possible arts of accumulating ruegelt, it is said
..."
He paused and shrugged, as if for once he could not
entirely credit the veracity of the lore he was about to convey. "Other things are said ... that Pater Pan is a thousand
years old ... that Pater Pan was once an Arkie ... that he
was born on Earth before the Age of Space began ... that he
has been a Rom and a Rippie and a Ronin ... that he is the
eternal spirit of the Child of Fortune of which the present
incarnation is merely an avatar ..."
At this extravagance, I curled my lips and snorted. For as
everyone knew, the Arkies passed with the First Starfaring
Age, no human has ever lived to be four hundred, and
reincarnation is nothing more than a literary metaphor .
On the other hand, the real Pater Pan, if such in fact
existed, must be a fellow of no little puissance to inspire such
a mythos, the Gypsy Jokers were real enough for two of them
to be relieving themselves in these very premises, and I
might be willing to credit Rand's tale of the tribe's riches.
"And where might the encampment of the Gypsy Jokers be
found?" I inquired, already beginning to consider practical
steps to become one of their number .
Rand shrugged. "Quien sabe? Certainly not nearby enough
for me to have ever spoken with someone apprised of the
location."
Jooni laughed. "you are thinking of becoming a Gypsy
Joker, Moussa?" she said japingly.
"1 thought I might explore the true nature of the vie and
allow this Pater Pan to recruit me if I deemed, it suitable," I
japed back. But as soon as the words passed my lips, I
realized that I might not be joking. Legend or not, this Pater
Pan, if he existed, was a male animal, ne, almost certainly
possessed of the usual phallic equipment, and just as certainly not uninterested in the pleasurable employment of
same. And while I had little confidence in the puissance of
either my wiles as an erstwhile femme fatale of Nouvelle
Orlcan or the as-yet-untested pouvoir of the ring of tantric
amplification I wore on my finger when it came to persuading
the sophisticated Edojin to part with ruegelt in exchange for
my amatory services, surely I possessed at least a certain
unsporting advantage when it came to winning the favor of
some egoistic tribal guru by the gratis granting of same.
Moreover, while this chain of logic might lack a certain
mathematical inevitability in terms of proceeding remorselessly
from initial premise to desired conclusion, the fact that at
present I had no other quest to pursue or avenue of escape
from indigency was suddenly all too apparent. In short, why
not? I had nothing to lose in the venture save the present
sequence of idle hours and of that I had certainly had a
surfeit.
"Come, come, Rand," I demanded. "Surely, with your vast
store of knowledge, you must have some clue as to the
vicinity of the Gypsy Jokers' territory?"
But for once Rand fell silent.
"Why not merely inquire of them?" Jooni said archly, nodding her head in the direction of the two Gypsy Jokers who
had now emerged from the toilet stalls and were making their
way past us to the egress.
"Indeed, porque no?" I shot back, rising to my feet, flush
with a certain indignation, courageous with rediscovered pride.
Vraiment, I knew full well that it was considered gross lese
majeste for such as myself to approach even members of a
lowly tribe such as the Wayfaring Strangers, but when all was
said and done, was I not still Moussa Shasta Leonardo of
Nouvelle Orlean, and were not even these lordly Gypsy
Jokers no more than puffed-up street urchins?
"A moment, bitte," I said, stepping into their path and
effectively blocking them. I was favored with a matched pair
of sneers and a lofty cocking of eyebrows.
"I wish to inquire
as to the location of your tribe's encampment ..." I continued in a tone far more polite than their
boorish manners justified.
"Porque?" the one in the beret at last deigned to utter.
"For the purpose of traveling thither."
This was greeted with snorts of derision and an attempt to
sidle by me. For a moment I was tempted to Touch one or
the other in the solar plexus so as to remove some of the
excess wind from their sails, but I had not yet used the ring,
and besides, such a public embarrassment of these Gypsy
Jokers would not be exactly politic. Any riposte must be
confined to the verbal level.
"I can see from your churlishness that you are entirely
unaware of my identity," I told them haughtily. This at least
had the desired effect of stopping them in their tracks. "Fear
not," I went on, "this innocent ignorance will to some extent
stand in mitigation when I relate this incident to Pater Pan."
I now had them exchanging glances of some uncertainty.
"You be an intimate of Pater Pan?" said the one with the
patchwork sash.
"Precisely spoken!" I told him. "I am his favored inamorata, having wandered from his embrace in a fit of pique, but
now willing to relent and grant him my favors once more. "
Since this was exactly my intent, the only falsehood lay in a
certain bending of the temporal sequence, and was this not
Edoku, where the procession of days and hours occurred with
just such a relativistic nonlinearity?
The Gypsy Jokers, alas, broke into braying laughter. "In
that case," said the beret, "we do know your identity. Vraiment,
your name is Legion!"
Even louder laughter at my expense. "Still," said the sash,
"such outrageousness is at least the right spirit, and deserves
its reward, ne?"
"Porque no?" said
the beret. "Let's try her wit, eh?"
"Bon," said the sash. " Attends, muchacha! Where are the
Gypsy Jokers to be found ...?"
"Over the river and through the woods ..."
"Where the sun never sets and the moon never shines ..."
"First star on the left, and straight on till morning ..."
"Somewhere under the rainbow ..."
"The circus is in town!"
And having performed this duet of doggerel, they pushed
past me, fairly doubled over with merriment, and made their
exit, leaving me standing there like a fool, with the laughter
of the entire Public Service Station ringing in my burning
ears.
Chagrined, outraged, fairly shaking with fury, I stood there
transfixed with embarrassment for an endless moment, and
then, not quite knowing what I was going to do, but determined that she who laughed last would laugh hardest, I
shouldered my pack and followed.
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