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FREAK

by Charles Carreon

My ass is wrapped in plastic ...

This nipple's plastic, too,

And all the food they feed me is

   mushy, pasty goo.

My parents don't seem to talk a lot,

They sit and watch a glowing box;

I'm stuck inside this plastic cage,

The only one who acts his age.

I don't know why it is so stupid here;

There's dullness everywhere --

It seeps inside me day by day

And though I scream won't go away.

I haven't really learned

   to form these questions in my head,

But like something out of focus,

Coming nearer every day,

I get this nasty feeling

That things won't go my way.

 

Now years have passed

   and I have learned to speak

   and wipe my butt;

So now it's time to go to school --

   An ugly place -- so what?

Mom works and works and now she's

   getting wrinkles in her face --

Dad seems so tired when he comes home --

   He sits in just one place.

And now it's growing louder

   All this racket in my skull --

Please get in line, don't touch those things,

   Please try to think; it's time to sing.

I'm a schoolboy, and I'm really thinking

   'bout Nancy's underwear; I'm a schoolboy,

but they treat me like a convict everywhere.

 

Now nailed inside this TV coffin,

I'd like to die; I'm seventeen.

She turned me down one too often,

And I've been smoking too much weed.

The world outside my window's glum,

I won't get a job because I'm too dumb

The shoes aren't hip,

My face has zits

And my whole life is in the pits.

I'm a teenage nervous breakdown,

My karma is givin' me the shakedown;

If I had two horns I couldn't be weirder;

I hate that face in the mirror --

Don't know how I got hooked up with it

Between me and him, we're a losing pair --

Even schoolchildren stop and stare

And say "Freak, he's a weirdo;"

They aren't afraid of me --

Please let me out oh god if you are there;

Since I was a child I've looked

   for you everywhere --

The nuns were fronts for a hollow scam,

And the Pope doesn't yell about Vietnam;

The whole damn earth just holds me down

And businessmen scare me with their frowns.

I'm a freak -- a weirdo --

A loser at the starting gate --

Freak -- a weirdo -- Don't worry

'bout me, I'm always late, Don't worry 'bout

me, I can't get a date; Don't worry 'bout

me, Don't worry, Don't worry 'bout me.

 

(Winter, 1986 at ML&B office)

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